Fraize Dotcom

It’s September 12th, and all sorts of Americans have converged on our nation’s capital to protest. Looking at their signs and shirt slogans, you’d believe they question the legitimacy of Barack Obama’s citizenship, their disagreement with the direction the health-care debate is going and the country’s perceived inexorable march towards socialism.

So, I became curious – it’s what intelligent people do when presented with information that they don’t understand. I started to research other countries. See what they do with their governments, their taxes, see what health-care systems they model, and what sort of consequences those choices have on their overall prosperity.

I chose Norway to compare against the United States, and what I discovered was very interesting.

First, let’s compare the political systems of Norway to the USA. We here in the US enjoy a representative democracy, currently run by the Democratic party. Norway is a constitutional monarchy with a parliament mostly run by the Socialist Left party. Gasp! Socialists! No doubt they’ve got a universal health-care system!

In fact, they do! Their health care system is 100% covered and paid for from tax revenue. There are waiting lists for some services – a hip-replacement, for example, can take 3 months before surgery. Certainly, they must have people dying left and right in Norway, right?

Wrong! Despite our short lines for health coverage, the quality is lower. Norway enjoys the 24th highest life expectancy in the world. USA rests comfortably at 50th place – just above Albania, though not as good as Bosnia.

To pay for universal health care, Norway’s highest individual income tax rate is upwards of 48%. Well, one might argue, because of all of this socialism and these expensive entitlement programs, Norway must have no incentive to work. They must have the laziest populace out there, right?

Wrong again. Norway’s GDP per capita is third highest in the world. USA with its highest rate at 38% sites sadly at sixth place.

Okay, so Norway beats us in productivity, health coverage and life expectancy, so surely their quality of life must be lower – bland and flattened due to this redistribution of wealth, right? Where’s the drive to achieve if there’s no chance to be rich?

To be a millionaire is surely every American’s dream! Unfortunately, you’d be better off in Norway. They have more millionaires per capita than the USA. Norway beats us with 1 millionaire per every 86 people while the US has 1 per 125.

Let’s sum up – Norway’s a Socialist country with universal health care, but they live longer, are more productive and have greater opportunities to be rich than here. So I’m left puzzled exactly why the right is so up in arms?

They say that the definition of insanity is yadda yadda blah blah you’ve heard it all before, but the final quarter of this year has been the most stressful time for me ever since I started working at ThinkGeek.

We are a retail store after all, and the Christmas shopping season requires an insane level of effort. We’re still trying to find more and more cool product, write copy for it, edit videos, all while maintaining inventory for all the products we already buy. Sales explode during this time, so extra attention is required to make sure we don’t run out of hot product.

This all translates into ten to fourteen hour days, barely leaving enough time to do my own holiday shopping. It’s no accident that many ThinkGeek employees give ThinkGeek product as Christmas gifts – it’s the easiest way to save time.

So why, when I’m already tearing my hair out with business, would I dare try and do NaNoWriMo again?

For the uninitiated, NaNoWriMo is a shortening of “National Novel Writing Month,” where crazy people try to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. Not impossible, but very very difficult. Last year, I was so buried in work that it was a fantastic relief to quit my NaNoWriMo attempt after 13,000 words. The year before, I successfully wrote over my 50k, but the resulting “novel” was so awful, I wouldn’t dare share it with anyone. This year, I have a killer idea and can’t wait to start writing.

I think that’s why people keep trying. My friend and coworker, Jamie, told me that when he envisions a character, they demand to be written. Once my idea formed in my head, the protagonist snapped nearly fully formed in my head, and I could see him tapping the glass between my imagination and my consciousness – “hey, buddy. Why aren’t you writing? It’s kinda bleak in here and I could use some toys to play with.”

So, yes – here’s my formal announcement. NaNoWriMo ‘09 will be attempted again this year. God help me.